Reading names of lost loved ones brings tears, joyful memories

A light snow fell as nearly 30 people gathered around a tall pine tree in 20-degree weather to witness the lighting of the "Tree of Life" as part of the Clark Fork Valley Hospital Hospice Service's annual ceremony, which gave friends and family a chance to honor their lost loved ones.

"This tradition has become very special to this community," said Dr. Greg Hanson, who heads hospice. Tim Williamson, a physical therapist at the Plains hospital, played the guitar as the group sang Christmas carols before retreating to the warmth of the hospital's distance learning room, where the remainder of the Friday evening observance took place.

Nearly 50 people, including several hospice staff members and volunteers, participated in the indoor ceremony, which hospice has been putting on for 12 years. Only once was the ceremony canceled — two years ago — due to a severe snow storm. The ceremony is held around the holidays each year because that's when many people tend to miss friends and family members who had passed away, said Janet Gates, manager of the hospice service. "Holidays are difficult and this is another way for people to honor their loved ones," she said after the hour-long ceremony. She said the ceremony is good for the healing process, especially during the holidays, when loved ones are missed most.

Janet Young, pastor of the Trinity Lutheran Church in Hot Springs and the hospice chaplain, led the ceremony with a prayer and the reading of passages from the Bible, including the Gospel of John's account of the birth of Jesus. Young, who has been the pastor in Hot Springs for six years, spoke of the loss of her mother 15 years ago and lit a candle in her memory.

She and several hospice members took turns reading 467 names of former hospice patients and the names submitted by people who wanted to recognize their loved ones. About 60 percent of the names were hospice clients. Wayne and Mary Egbert, owners of the Bunch-Toews Funeral Chapels in Plains and in Thompson Falls, helped recite the names. Three hundred and ninety-two names were read last year. Listed in the back of the room were more than 800 names of "past honorees."

Hospice staff members raised their candles each time a patient's name was read. A couple of the readers had trouble holding the tears back as they read the names of people they had come to know as patients. The reading portion of the ceremony took about 30 minutes. Those in attendance had a candle lit for their family member as the name was read. Most of the names were Sanders County residents, but Fern Johnson, the hospice staff member who coordinated the event, said there were a few from outside the county and even out of state.

Young compared the Christmas tree lights and the candles to "the light of Christ" and said the lights showed the "power of light over darkness." This was Young's first time to participate in the ceremony. The Reverend Gaylund Olson, former pastor of the Thompson Falls Community Congregational Church, had led the ceremony in the past, but was reassigned to a church in the Midwest.

Each year, the list grows, said Gates, who added that in their first ceremony, they had under 100 names. In 2004, they read 319 names.

The Tree of Life Ceremony is the hospice's only fund-raiser of the year, although people don't have to donate to submit a name. Gates said they use the money to cover uninsured care for their hospice patients.

The hospital's hospice service is presently caring for nine patients, according to Johnson. Twenty-four of their patients were added to the Tree of Life Ceremony's list this year.

The mission of hospice is to care for a patient who has been diagnosed with an illness that will result in a life expectancy of six months or less. "Difficult as it may be to think about, let alone talk about, each life will come to an end," said Gates in her handout about the program. The idea of a hospice program is to give those people the chance to plan when they "cross into the threshold into the final stages."

Hospice staff members and volunteers help care for a patient in the final months, weeks and days of their life to make their time as comfortable as possible, according to Gates, who said their coverage area includes all of Sanders County.

Friday's ceremony also included refreshments and music by the Valley Strings, a group of musicians made up of seven members from Thompson Falls and Trout Creek.