Food for Thought: I have everything I want, why am I not happy?

You don’t need a degree in psychology to know when you’re off-track,

sometimes it can just creep up on you.

It seems like you wake up one day and realize that things are not right. These are a few of the signs: you don’t want to get out of bed, have a hard time motivating yourself to do routine tasks, have doubts about yourself, feel mildly depressed for days at a time, sometimes overeat and/or use alcohol and drugs to feel better or escape, feel bored or restless and wish you were somewhere else.

Feeling dissatisfied with your life is not a pleasant experience, but it can lead you in a positive direction. These feelings may be important because they are telling you that your actions are out of synch with your values, goals or talents.

Rediscover What Is Important To You

Imagine your life is handed back to you and you are able to do anything you want. What is important to you? What values will direct you?

Consider each word on the following list individually. It is not necessary to rank them or compare them against each other.

Assign a rating to each word:

1 = Critically important to me

2 = Important to me

3 = I can live without it

_Acceptance by others

_Accomplishment

_Activity

_Appreciation

_Authority

_Beauty

_Being liked

_Certainty

_Challenge

_Choice

_Comfort

_Community service

_Creativity

_Enjoyment

Ethics

Excellence

_Excitement

Financial security

_Fitness

_Flexibility

_Freedom

_Fulfilling my potential

_Fun

_Growth

_Health

_Helping others

Honesty

_Independence

_Informality

_Leisure

_Mastery

_Pets

_Making a difference

_Morality

_Nature

_Novelty

_Originality

_Pleasure

_Popularity

_Prestige

__ Prosperity

_Personal development

_Quality

_Recognition

_Relaxation

_Respect

_Risk

_Solitude

_Spirituality

_Power

_Peace

_Privacy

_Stability

_Status

_Stimulation

_Surprise

_Time for friends

_Time for my family

_Uniqueness

_Variety

_Wealth

_Wisdom

Now make a list that summarizes your most important values. If you think of something that isn’t listed, feel free to add it.

The final part of this process (and this is a very streamlined version of what is possible) is to compare how you are currently spending your time with your list of most important values.

How well do they match each other? What clues can you find that will help you gain more satisfaction in your life? What things don’t match? What can you do about it?

Dr. Leta A. Livoti Ph.D., LCSW, LCPC is a psychotherapist in Thompson Falls. She can be contacted at 827-0700.