COLUMN: Steeplechase

As comedian Jerry Seinfeld used to always say, “what is the deal with….?”. In this case, insert the word steeplechase at the end of that inquiry.

It is a centuries old human endeavor that began, one source said, with people running from church steeple to church steeple in old times, presumably looking for more religion or possibly running between the two tallest and thereby most visible structures in towns and villages. Heavenly race guides, if you will.

The steeples, it seems, were a guide for the participants.

But it actually began when someone who was watching horses run and jump in an equestrian event had the thought that steeplechase, or such horsing around, should be a sport for humans.

In Norway, that person would have likely been left behind on the village raids, charged with keeping an eye on the boats.

What is the deal with that?

There are no high school sanctioned steeplechase races in Montana that I’ve ever heard of. The event involves running a course that is 3000 meters long and has seven water pits competitors have to jump over.

These are 12 foot long water jumps and the best way to do that is jump up onto the stationary (as in doesn’t move if you slam into it) hurdles on steroids. If, after jumping onto the big hurdle, supposedly using it to help propel you over the water pit, you are too tired to jump 12 feet of water, you simply land in the water pit, which is mercifully deepest at the end with the hurdle.

There would be a myriad of problems with steeplechase in Montana high school circles.

Injuries for one.

Have you seen the contestants who cross the line in the regular 3200 meter run at most track events? They don't look like they would like to swim.

And jumping upon a 2.5 foot high hurdle that doesn’t “give” when hit, could result in a lot of high schoolers walking around with their ribs taped….or worse.

The other day I was at a softball game earlier in the day than when they are usually played. The sun was shining across a gloriously blue sky. It was however, colder than a well diggers armpits.

Take that same cold air and apply it to the steeplechase water pits and you’ve got yourself a good, old-fashioned sticky situation. Ice is hard, always remember that.

And if you clear enough of the water pit to simply get soaked, that cold Montana spring air will remind you of the effect cold air has on water.

In the old days, when the “sport” was born, the water pits were streams and other geographical obstacles one would encounter along a forest path.

What is the deal with that?

Strangely enough, enough people took up the sport that it was recognized as a men’s event in the 1920 Antwerp (Belgium) Olympic Games. The women, who tend to assess things if not better, at least longer, than men, were granted the right to jump and splash in the 2008 Beijing Olympics.

It was Chinese population control on display.

So, if you aspire to be a steeplechaser, keep these thoughts in mind:

1) you will likely have to move to another state, if any other state has high school steeplechase it would probably be one with a warmer climate.

2) you should be able to run 3,000 meters. Period.

3) The obstacles and barriers are set up every 80 meters after beginning the race barrier free for the first 200 meters. Assess, adapt, overcome.

4) swimming lessons are not mandatory but probably a good idea.

5) you should be able to jump 2.5 meters high and not mind splinters.

So, future steeplechasers, if those basic concepts are no problem for you, go for it.

I will be watching, scratching my head, and wondering….what is the deal with that?